Review: Captains Outrageous

Captains Outrageous by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

When Hap comes into some money, he and Leonard go on a vacation and wind up stranded in Mexico. True to form, they end up helping a fisherman and his daughter with a problem they're having...

This is my third read of Captains Outrageous but the first time in over a decade so it was like a completely new book.

Captains Outrageous sees Hap and Leonard going up against a Mexican loanshark and his goons. It also brings the crew back together with Jim Bob Luke, Marvin Hanson, Charlie Blank, and Veil. Unlike a lot of series mysteries, Lansdale isn't afraid to upset the apple cart in a big way.

Hap and Leonard go through quite a bit in this one and we all needed a break after it, even Lansdale, for this was the last Hap and Leonard book for something like eight years. While hilarious, crude, and full of violence, it's also really bleak.

There's a lot of interesting stuff going on but it's easily my least favorite of the Hap and Leonard books up to this point. It felt unfocused at times and might have worked better as two linked novellas.

All things considered, though, it was a pretty good read. Hap and Leonard had some good character moments and things ended with the pair in a good place for once, a place they'd stay in until Lansdale brought our boys back in Vanilla Ride. Three out of five stars.


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Review: Briar Patch Boogie: A Hap and Leonard Novelette

Briar Patch Boogie: A Hap and Leonard Novelette by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Hap and Leonard go fishing and encounter a dying woman with an arrow sticking out of her side.

Briar Patch Boogie is a short Hap and Leonard story featuring some crazies who hunt people for sport. It takes place after Honky Tonk Samurai. In fact, it answers some questions left after that book and may be considered somewhat spoilerish.

Anyway, our boys crack wise and try to do the right thing while not becoming human pincushions. Like I said, it's a short tale and I've pretty much said all I can. It's a quick and enjoyable read. 3.5 out of 5 stars.

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Review: Hap and Leonard Ride Again

Hap and Leonard Ride Again by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The guys at Tachyon sent me this as well as Hap and Leonard. There's a significant amount of overlap so some of this will be a clip job.

Introduction by Michael Kortya: I'm always interested in what one writer writes about another. Kortya echoes my feelings on Hap and Leonard and Joe Lansdale in general. He also refrains from spoiling the shit out of stories, which is growing increasingly rare in introductions.

Joe R. Lansdale, Hap and Leonard, and Me by Bill Crider: Bill Crider details his decades-long friendship with Joe Lansdale and gives an outsider's point of view on Joe working on the series.

Veil’s Visit: Leonard gets arrested for burning down the crack house next door again and Hap's friend Veil takes the case.

In this tale. Lansdale introduces Veil, a lawyer friend of Hap's that later makes an appearance in Captains Outrageous. Veil's backstory and defense of Leonard make for a memorable tale.

Death By Chili: Hap and Leonard tackle the mystery of a dead champion chili cook. Was it suicide or... murder?

This tale is mostly conjecture, peppered with Lansdale wit, and followed by Lansdale's own chili recipe.

A Bone Dead Sadness: Marvin Hanson takes on a case 25 years cold so a dying widow can find out what happened to her son.

A Bone Dead Sadness is kind of a locked room mystery featuring Marvin Hanson. Hap and Leonard are absent but mentioned a few times.

Not Our Kind: This tale chronicled an early encounter featuring a teenage Hap and Leonard and some bullies. The guys were cracking wise but things didn't go as they usually do.

The Oak and the Pond: Hap tells the story of what happened to the Robin Hood Tree, a tree mentioned in several of the early Hap and Leonard books.

The Boy Who Became Invisible: Hap recounts a tale of his youth, the tale of the boy everyone picked on.

The Boy Who Became Invisible is a powerful tale because it's all too believable and very relatable. I remembered the ending but it still hit pretty hard. This particular version of The Boy Who Became Invisible is in screenplay format.

Joe R. Lansdale Interviews Hap Collins and Leonard Pine: Lansdale interviews the dynamic duo. It's short, funny, and has the all too true line "It's the family you choose that counts."

An Interview with Joe R. Lansdale, His Own Self: Rick Klaw interviews Joe, asking his thoughts on such topics as racism, genres, Texas, violence, and other subjects.

The Care and Feeding and Raising Up of Hap and Leonard: Lansdale talks about the genesis of Hap and Leonard and writing the books, confirming that Hap is something of a stand-in for Lansdale himself.

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Hap and Leonard

Hap and Leonard by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Hap and Leonard is a short story collection featuring Hap and Leonard. I'm going to chunk it up and review each piece separately. I'm pretty sure I've read most of the stories before but my memory isn't what it once was.

Introduction by Michael Kortya: I'm always interested in what one writer writes about another. Kortya echoes my feelings on Hap and Leonard and Joe Lansdale in general. He also refrains from spoiling the shit out of stories, which is growing increasingly rare in introductions.

Hyenas: After Leonard kicks the shit out of a trio of guys at a bar, one of them offers him a job. Can Hap and Leonard get the man's kid brother away from the bad crowd he's running with?

I could cheat and do a cut and paste job from my review of Hyenas but I won't. Hyenas is a novella length distillation of what Hap and Leonard books are normally like. Much like last time, my favorite line was "Brett thought it would be cute if we got matching guns with our initials on them."

Veil’s Visit: Leonard gets arrested for burning down the crack house next door again and Hap's friend Veil takes the case.

In this tale. Lansdale introduces Veil, a lawyer friend of Hap's that later makes an appearance in Captains Outrageous. Veil's backstory and defense of Leonard make for a memorable tale.

Death By Chili: Hap and Leonard tackle the mystery of a dead champion chili cook. Was it suicide or... murder?

This tale is mostly conjecture, peppered with Lansdale wit, and followed by Lansdale's own chili recipe.

Dead Aim: When their friend Marvin Hanson offers them a job, Hap, Leonard, and an axe handle Hap named Agnes find themselves putting the fear of God into a woman's abusive ex-husband. Things quickly prove to be much more complex than they originally thought.

Dead Aim was hilarious, as usual, but I thought it could have used more action. Also, the plot slithered all over the place.

The Boy Who Became Invisible: Hap recounts a tale of his youth, the tale of the boy everyone picked on.

The Boy Who Became Invisible is a powerful tale because it's all too believable and very relatable. I remembered the ending but it still hit pretty hard.

Not Our Kind: This tale chronicled an early encounter featuring a teenage Hap and Leonard and some bullies. The guys were cracking wise but things didn't go as they usually do.

Bent Twig: Brett's daughter is into drugs and hooking again and Hap goes looking for her.

Bent Twig is a tale of loyalty, both of Hap for Brett and Leonard toward Hap. The boys get into the usual shit storm, complete with jokes, and things are very satisfying.

Joe R. Lansdale Interviews Hap Collins and Leonard Pine: Lansdale interviews the dynamic duo. It's short, funny, and has the all too true line "It's the family you choose that counts."

Afterword by Joe R. Lansdale: Lansdale talks about the genesis of Hap and Leonard and writing the books, confirming that Hap is something of a stand-in for Lansdale himself.

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Review: Rumble Tumble

Rumble Tumble by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

When someone brings Brett news of her daughter wanting out of the prostitution business, Hap & Leonard, with Brett in tow, go to Hootie Hoot Oklahoma to find her. But does Tillie want to be found?

My Hap and Leonard re-read continues with the fifth volume, Rumble Tumble. The Hap and Leonard tradition of kicking ass and cracking wise continues, this time featuring pistol-whipping, steroided up bodyguards, hookers, bikers, drug dealers, and one red haired little person.

Rumble Tumble isn't my favorite Hap and Leonard novel. After reading two others in relatively rapid succession, some of the luster has worn off. It also represents a slight dip in quality, along with the next book, Captains Outrageous, before Joe brings the gang back in style in the seventh book, Vanilla Ride.

However, an average quality Hap and Leonard book is still a lot of fun. There is still great humor and a brutal conclusion that is probably the most violent one in the series at this point. Not only that, there are some great character moments with Hap, Leonard, and Brett. Hap and Leonard never pass through the fire unscathed and Hap feels pretty worn out by the end of this book.

While it's not my favorite, Rumble Tumble is still packed with mojo and a fun read. 3.5 out of five stars.



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Review: Bad Chili

Bad Chili by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

A local biker is murdered and Leonard is the prime suspect. After being bit by a possibly rabid squirrel, Hap gets out of the hospital and starts investigating. Can Hap and Leonard escape a web of blackmail, murder, bikers, and less savory things?

My reread of the Hap and Leonard books I haven't written reviews for continues. In this, the fourth volume, Lansdale introduces a couple new characters to the Hap and Leonard mythos that will be important for years to come: Hap's hot nurse girlfriend Brett and Jim Bob Luke, the cockiest detective in the world. At least one long-running character makes his exit.

The case starts simple enough. A biker who'd been seen with Leonard's boyfriend is found shotgunned to death and all fingers point to Leonard, who goes on the lam. Hap tries to hide Leonard while figuring things out and steps in a hornet's nest of grease nappers and brutal videos of gay men getting raped.

This is the fourth Hap and Leonard book I've re-read and I'm continually shocked at how brutal the early tales were compared to the more recent ones. Even though the Lansdale humor is in full effect, I never get the feeling the guys are working with a safety net, a feeling common in series detective books.

As usual, the bad guys were pretty vile, although I wasn't sure who the true villains were for much of the book. Since I was a beardless young man the first time I read this, it was like reading a new book for the most part. The ending was pretty brutal, as a lot of Lansdale endings were in the early days. Uncle Joe sure doesn't mind putting his characters through the meat grinder.

The Hap and Leonard series continues to roll on, mojo style. Four out of five stars.

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Review: The Two-Bear Mambo

The Two-Bear Mambo by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Hap's ex-girlfirend Florida disappears while investigating the murder of blues musician's son. Hap and Leonard, on behalf of Marvin Hanson, go Grovetown, a racist hive of scum and villainy, to investigate. Will they find Florida and bring her back?

2016 Reread:
My quest to reread all of the Hap and Leonard books before the TV series drops so I can lord it over everyone else continues. In this, the third Hap and Leonard book, the boys go looking for Florida, Hap's ex and the current girlfriend of Marvin Hanson, their detective friend. Florida went to the most racist town in Texas investigating a jailhouse suicide that may have been murder and wound up missing.

The boys don't actually do a whole lot of detective work in this one. They mostly crack wise and get their asses handed to them. I'd forgotten the beatings Hap and Leonard take in earlier books.

Grovetown seems like a horrible place, backward and racist, but all too plausible. Lansdale peoples it with interesting characters, most of them with hidden depths. Since it's been at least a decade since I read this the first time, I'd forgotten most of the wrinkles of the plot and was pretty surprised by the ending.

The Lansdale wit is in full effect in this one. Even after reading mostly Lansdale in recent days, I still find myself surprised at his skill with colorful similes, like Raymond Chandler drenched in Miller High Life.

While it wasn't my favorite Lansdale book, The Two-Bear Mambo was still a very solid read, even the second time. Four out of five stars.

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Review: FF, Vol. 2: Family Freakout

FF, Vol. 2: Family Freakout by Matt Fraction
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The FF plan to bring the Fanastic Four back to earth in time to stop Doctor Doom, Kang, and Annihilus from becoming Doom the Annhilating Conqueror. Things don't go as planned...

Matt Fraction and Michael Allred's run on FF ends with a bang. The FF take in Impossible Man's son Adolph, try to bring back the Fantastic Four, and go to war with Doctor Doom. Fraction does a lot to elevate Scott Lang in this volume and goes a long way toward dragging him out of Hank Pym's size-changing shadow.

The battle with Doom was very well done and Doom was true to his scene-chewing self. Fraction's portrayal of The Watcher was also pretty great and I loved the stuff on the blue area of the moon. Ahura stepping up for the war was also a nice touch.

Much like the last volume, this book reads like a modern day love letter to the Stan Lee and Jack Kirby days of the Fantastic Four. It's a damn shame this is the last of Matt Fraction and Mike Allred on FF. It's been a lot of fun. Four out of five stars.

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Review: FF, Vol. 1: Fantastic Faux

FF, Vol. 1: Fantastic Faux by Matt Fraction
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The new FF are struggling to hold down the fort. Bentley gets up to some mischief. The future Human Torch awakens and the future he's predicted draws nearer.

Ant-Man and company continue trying to fill the shoes of the Fantastic Four and go up against a leviathan, The Wizard, Blastaar, and The Inhumans but their biggest enemies seem to be themselves.

That might be stretching it a little but Matt Fraction and Mike Allred have created a throwback to the Fantastic Four of the 1960's, a bickering team that still feels like a family.

I dig Matt Fraction's writing. Maybe not as much as Dan Slott's on the Silver Surfer but he does a good job of writing something that works to Mike Allred's strengths and fits his art style. He also gets some mileage out of The Wizard and the Inhumans, something I don't think many writers do a good job of. I also like how he's planting seeds for the next volume while doing some good character development within the FF cast.

I really like what Matt Fraction is doing here and I'm keen to start the next volume. Four out of five stars.

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Review: Fantastic Four, Vol. 1: New Departure, New Arrivals

Fantastic Four, Vol. 1: New Departure, New Arrivals by Matt Fraction
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Reed Richards is dying and plans an expedition through all of space-time to find a cure with the rest of the Fantastic Four and the two Richards kids. Before they leave, the FF recruit their substitutes; Ant-Man, She-Hulk, Medusa, and some chick the Torch was boning. The FF is only planning on being gone for four minutes of Earth time. What could go wrong?

Confession time: I have over 100 issues of Fantastic Four scattered in the various comic boxes in the Dan Cave. When I saw Marvel was doing a non-standard Fantastic Four series with Mike Allred doing the art chores, I waited patiently for this very volume to fall into my clutches.

This volume is split into two threads. The iconic Fantastic Four lineup preparing to leave earth for parts unknown, and the subs, Ant-Man, She-Hulk, Medusa, and Miss Thing. I pretty much only picked up this volume for the second thread.

While the stuff with the iconic lineup is pretty good, I found the storyline of the subs trying to fill the shoes of the real deal to be far more interesting. I love future Human Torch coming back to warn the new team of a menace and the homage to Fantastic Four #1 from way back in 1961 in the form of Mole Man attacking the surface world.

Matt Fraction's storyline is very intriguing but I'd be lying if I didn't say Mike Allred's art is the main reason I was up for it. I've been a fan of his pop art style since Madman and love what he does with the Fantastic Four here.

Even though this volume is short, it stands alone pretty well on its own while leaving enough unanswered questions to get me to read the next one. Four out of five stars.

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Review: Silver Surfer, Vol. 3: Last Days

Silver Surfer, Vol. 3: Last Days by Dan Slott
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The Silver Surfer and Dawn get trapped in a time loop, get stuck on a paradise planet, and try to rebuild the universe.

Here we are, the final volume, as of now, of Dan Slott and Michael Allred's run on The Silver Surfer. Honestly, it's kind of a mixed bag, though I can't lay the blame solely on the Surfer's gleaming shoulders.

The first story is a time loop that's depicted in a creative way, the panels forming a Moebius strip. First off, I thought this was very clever and pertinent to the story, not as gimmicky as I originally thought. I loved that the story featured Space French-speaking aliens and the area the Surfer and Dawn traveled through was called The Giraud expanse, a nice reference to noted French comic artist Moebius, aka Jean Giraud.

The second story was also pretty good. It turns out Surfer and Dawn never left the paradise planet they found in the first story. Paradise wasn't what it was cracked up to be.

The third story featured Dawn and Surfer taking the long way back to Earth, visiting everyone they met in the previous two volumes. It reminded me of the 10th Doctor's swan song before his regeneration and made me think I wouldn't be pleased with the final story in the collection.

The fourth story is what sucked half a star of enjoyment out of the book. It's a shame that this title's revolutionary run was derailed by Secret Wars. Still, it was cool seeing The Silver Surfer and Dawn attempting to rebuild the universe.

While I didn't like the abrupt ending to the series due to Secret Wars, Slott and Allred did a good job making chicken salad with the chicken parts they were given. I hear the series is coming back and I'll be ready when it does. 3.5 out of 5 stars.

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Review: Honky Tonk Samurai

Honky Tonk Samurai by Joe R. Lansdale
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

When an old lady shoots some video of Leonard kicking the shit out of a dog abuser, she tasks Hap & Leonard with finding her missing grand daughter in exchange for not informing the authorities. Hap & Leonard are soon up to their eyebrows in a stew of blackmail, prostitutes, and a testicle taking killer called The Canceler...

The dynamic duo really stepped in a steaming pile in this one. Brett, Hap's girlfriend, bought Marvin Hanson's detective agency and the boys are now legit private eyes. Their first licensed case might be their last. Honky Tonk Samurai brings a few of the Hap & Leonard supporting cast members together like the A-Team. Jim Bob Luke, Cason, and Vanilla Ride all have pretty big roles as Hap and Leonard try to unravel the case. Booger, the newbie, was much more interesting than I originally thought. Complicating matters are a young woman who may be connected to Hap, bikers, the Dixie Mafia, the Barbecue King, and The Canceler.

This story is vintage Lansdale. The jokes are hilarious, the writing is crisp, and the violence is gore-soaked. Since it's Hap and Leonard we're talking about, I knew asses would be kicked and shots would be fired but the climax was even more than I expected.

Honky Tonk Samurai is much beefier than the previous two H&L outings but Lansdale's latest tale is balls to the wall for much of its 350 pages. I lost track of all the quotable lines I meant to remember in the mad rush to the end.

While the climax was great, one of the twists nearly had me shitting myself. One of my few complaints with the series is that all the wisecracking makes you forget lives are at stake. No more! The book left so many unanswered questions that I hope the next Hap & Leonard book is already at the press.

Four out of five stars. If you can handle 350 pages of pure Mojo, get it now!

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